Written By Kevin McSweeney
It’s not a band name that suggests loud, aggressive music, is it? For the record, they share their name with a caravan park in Cumbria and a care home for the elderly in Tiverton.
Those whose lives began in the mid to late stages of the 20th Century might understand why it brings to mind Monty Python’s Flying Circus for me. In musical terms, it makes me think of an effete late-stage Britpop band in the mould of Mansun or The Bluetones.
Nomenclature can be as deceptive as appearances, however, as what we actually get is something darker, grittier and nastier than anything that would have made it onto TFI Friday back in the day*.
The band’s own take on their sound is more reassuring than their name. “This record is a sermon from the void – five hymns for a world unravelling,” according to vocalist Noah Annandale.
“It’s the sound of what’s left when everything else burns away.” That sounds promising! The EP was released independently on July 24th, so I’m a little bit tardy as always – more so than the vocalist and drummer from Obituary, in fact! – but better late than never, I suppose.
I will now prise the Nihilistic Majesties by The Larches EP apart, track-by-track, like the petals of a flower yet to bloom, to see what can be found in the folds. Here goes nihil!
Nihilistic Majesties Track-by-Track Review
Raxidermy
My spellcheck wants to correct this to taxidermy, understandably. I love a good portmanteau but I’m struggling to penetrate the meaning of this one, especially as I don’t have a lyric sheet.
Anyway, the way this song explodes into life reminds me of how CK Killer did something very similar as the opening track of Amen’s We Have Come For Your Parents.
There’s no small amount of groove in that primary riff, giving it a distinct Southern flavour, somewhat ironically for a band from the north east of England.
It’s jarring at times, due to them alternating between 4/4 and what I think is 6/4 (I’m incredibly bad at identifying time signatures for someone who used to play drums.)
The riff in the slower middle section couldn’t sound more like Pantera if you smothered it in pig squeals and draped it in the Confederate flag. Obviously, this’d be The Great Southern Trendkill-era Pantera, when the sound became grittier and less polished. Annandale’s vocal performance is every bit as raspy and gravel-throated as the late Casey Chaos of the aforementioned Amen.
Smother The Hero
I trust we’re smothering the hero in kisses or slaps on the back for saving the world from The Joker, Skeletor, Ming The Merciless or whoever else might be up to no good. Rascals, the lot of ‘em! I digress!
Opening a song with quarter beats on the china cymbal is always a sign of brutality to come, and indeed there’s something of Sepultura’s Refuse/Resist about the track when it gets fully underway.
If you could imagine that Chaos AD classic being covered by a crust punk band, you’d be half way there. We actually get some clean singing from Annandale on this track. His clean vocals resemble those of Vision of Disorder’s Tim Williams.
They can’t help playing silly buggers with the time signatures again, as they alternate between 4/4 and 7/4 time in the middle section. (Take that with a pinch of salt and consult someone who is actually knowledgeable about music.) I see why they chose this track as their recent single. By Christ, it’s catchy!
Corrosion of Conscience
It’s a shame the bass intro isn’t longer, as it was infectious! I can’t help noticing the similarity of the title to the name of one of the best sludge/stoner bands to ever do it. Also, they seem to be alternating between hardcore punk and Southern stoner sludge, which mirrors COC’s career progression.
They go from fast, abrasive punk to full-on groove, and once again their deviation from conventional time signatures wrongfoots you.
The ride-cymbal heavy groove in the middle certainly had me tapping my foot. It sounds almost like Led Zeppelin’s Immigrant Song, with just a pinch of Whole Lotta Love.
That’s probably not a band they’d expect to be compared to in a review, but my propensity for talking nonsense is not to be underestimated.
One sensible thing I will say is this: you’re going to struggle to get through this short track without wanting to dance. Corrosion of Conscience is catchier than Chlamydia!
Drought
I do hope this isn’t an omen. You see, Drought is by far the longest song on this EP. This is as the band’s native United Kingdom is experiencing an unprecedentedly lengthy period of hot, sunny weather, and many parts of the country are on the verge of a water shortage.
The UK is a place where it can piss down solidly for nine months and then, in the summer, there’s a hosepipe ban. Once again, I digress!
If we’re looking for a lazy musical comparison, I guess it would be Pantera’s Floods, from the aforementioned album The Great Southern Trendkill.
This is due to it sounding subdued, but ominously so, with its dark arpeggios and vocals that are all the more sinister for their tenderness.
I should point out that, vocally, it’s more of a Maynard James Keenan vibe than anything you might associate with Phil Anselmo, at least during the quiet parts.
I like the way the melodies seem to come apart at the seams, with the instruments seemingly going out of tune in their hands. It’s cleverly done! When it gets heavy, it really gets heavy, and then we’re definitely in Pantera territory, with one or two pig squeals starting to emerge from the palm-muted riffs.
Dopeslut
There’s a charming little title to bring matters to a close! Is it dope as in cool, or is it a drug-related reference? Once again, a lyric sheet would help.
The sample at the start certainly sets the tone! There’s a bit of a bluesy death ‘n’ roll swagger to the opening riff, making it sound not unlike something from Entombed’s Wolverine Blues.
This attitude is carried over throughout the track. It’s the ballsiest effort on show, swapping the belligerence of earlier tracks for brashness and bravado.
This may be attributable to the title and, presumably, the nature of the lyrics. If any of this sounds like criticism, it’s not. It’s merely acknowledgement of another string to their bow.
The intentional unravelling of the track at the end is a nice touch, and it brings to a close a highly promising EP.
I’ve compared them to a few bands, but mostly they remind me of Amen, if anyone remembers Casey Chaos – may he rest in peace – and the boys: the big, heavy riffs, the catchy hooks, the alternative/punk rock sensibilities, the lo-fi ethos.
It’s all there, and presented by a band whose name is every bit as incongruous as that of Party Cannon, but a good deal more subtly so. I look forward to the onward marches of The Larches.
*Both Napalm Death and Slipknot appeared on TFI Friday back in the day – proof, if any were required at this stage, that I don’t know what I’m talking about.
Metal Lair awards Nihilistic Majesties by The Larches four and a half devil horns out of five.
EP Track listing:
1. Raxidermy
2. Smother the Hero
3. Corrosion of Conscience
4. Drought
5. Dopeslut
Band Lineup
Noah Annandale – Vocals
Sonny Evans – Lead Guitar and Vocals
Joel Hardwick – Rhythm Guitar
Alfie Murphy – Bass Guitar
George Moss – Drums
The Larches Online
About The Author
Kevin McSweeney is Metal Lair’s resident scribe of the underground, eternally rummaging through the global metal scene for riffs worth your time.
As the guiding hand behind Seven Deadly Songs every Friday, he has an uncanny knack for finding the track you didn’t know you needed, usually before finishing his pint.
Equal parts loyal, kind, and quietly razor-witted, Kevin brings deep knowledge, impeccable taste, and a steady, reliable presence to Metal Lair.
Read More From This Author:
Album Review: Exodus Unknown by Imperium
Remembering Lou Koller: The Voice of Sick Of It All (1967 to 2026)
EP Review: The Liminal Tapes by Mercers
Wailin’ Storms The Arsonist Review
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