Written By Sabbatha Ashvale
Editors Note:
One year ago, Metalhead Horoscopes crawled out of the void, unpolished, irregular, and occasionally late as hell. Some weeks were missed. Some signs definitely waited longer than they should have. That’s how underground things start. Messy, half-feral, built on instinct instead of schedules.
At the start, I didn’t know if this column would stick. I wasn’t even sure I was good at it. Some weeks were hit-or-miss and consistency was… aspirational at best.
Then a few people left comments saying they could read these every week. That was it. That was the spark. Because in metal you don’t need a crowd, you need one person who gets it. One person is enough to make you sharpen your edge, show up on time, and take the thing seriously.
That’s when this stopped being an experiment and became a commitment.
But here we are. A year in. Sharper. Louder and consistant.
This isn’t astrology for people who “kind of like metal,” but for metalheads who read liner notes, argue about mixes, and know that discipline is just another form of devotion.
If you’ve been here since the early chaotic weeks, thank you for sticking around.
If you just found this column, welcome to the long game.
Same stars. Better riffs.
Weekly Metalhead Horoscope
This week isn’t subtle. It’s a major shift.
Mars body slams into Capricorn like a feral fan in the pit forcing focus, discipline, and long-game thinking. No more “someday,” the time is now.
The New Moon in Sagittarius (Dec 19) lights a fire under long-term plans
Tour dates, new gear and new music. Whatever gets your blood moving again. Early in the week feels foggy and emotionally off-tempo thanks to some cosmic gate keeping, (Sun vs Saturn and Neptune).
Translation: doublecheck gig times, don’t just assume anything and maybe don’t start beefs that don’t need to exist.
Now-horns up. Let’s get specific.
ARIES (March 21–April 19)
The Sagittarius New Moon doesn’t gently adjust your plans, it blows them the hell up. The route you thought you were taking is gone, burned down, barricaded. Good. You weren’t stuck, you were playing it safe, and safe was killing your momentum.
When Mars, your ruling planet, riffs in Capricorn on the 15th, it’s like grabbing the mic back after months of being muted. The fire returns, but it’s controlled now, focused, strategic and dangerous.
You’re not thrashing blindly anymore, you’re lining up the strike. It may look quiet on the surface, but don’t mistake that for weakness. This is the wind up and January is the wall of death.
Metal advice: Don’t panic over silence. That’s the sound of momentum gathering.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Gore – Wrath Spinefarm Records
TAURUS April 21 – May 21
This week someone you love karate kicks you in the pit directly in the chest and you feel the pain. The Sagittarius New Moon doesn’t soften the blow either, it forces you to feel it. Holiday celebrations feel hollow. Victories taste flat. You’re carrying weight that isn’t just yours, and it’s exhausting.
Money, power, and trust get put under harsh stage lighting. You feel the weight of shared resources and debt. None of it gets to hide in the shadows anymore.
That new gear purchase you want badly comes with a very high cost you can’t dodge. To move forward, you’ll have to cut something loose, even if it feels brutal.
Metal advice: You can’t carry every amp at once. Choose what actually matters.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Paradise Lost – Salvation Nuclear Blast Records
GEMINI May 22 – June 21
This week isn’t about flirting with possibilities it’s about locking something in and losing sleep over it.
The Sagittarius New Moon snaps a decision shut. Commitments and alliances means this is a sign the fucking contract kind of week.
That special someone officially in your orbit? This didn’t come easy. You argued, negotiated, doubted, rewired the whole thing three times in your head. Now it’s real and you’re wrecked and relieved in equal measure.
Don’t rush the celebrations. You’re still taking inventory of who actually pulls weight and who’s just talking shit.
The noise to support ratio matters now. As the year winds down, you’re learning that being talented isn’t enough, you need people who show up when shit gets real, not just when it’s interesting.
Metal advice: Chaos is your fuel but commitment is the weapon. Use it wisely.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: KMFDM – Oubliette Metropolis Records
CANCER June 22 – July 22
You’re running on fumes, even if you refuse to admit it. The last few weeks have been a grind of endless gigs with no real downtime.
The Sagittarius New Moon doesn’t offer comfort, it forces a hard reset. Work, health and daily survival are something in the machine that has to be torn out and rebuilt before it eats you alive.
Here’s the hard truth, you’ve been fixated on one song like it’s the only riff. That tunnel vision is strangling your time. This week demands a wider scope. New musical paths will open up to you.
Tension creeps into close relationships too. Some people amplify your fire. Others just rattle chains and call it support. You’ll know the difference immediately and you won’t have the bandwidth for the wrong kind of noise.
Metal advice: Protect your energy like it’s sacred gear. Not everyone gets access to the stage.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Iotunn – Waves Below Metal Blade Records
LEO July 23 – August 23
This week opens with consequences. Not vibes. Not lessons.
You went loud, generous and excessive because that’s how you live and now the wreckage is sitting right in front of you.
The Sagittarius New Moon doesn’t coddle you. It tells you to headbang with it.
What was impulse, what was ego, and what was actually worth the burn?
There’s a physical edge to this week too and your body reminds you it’s not immortal just because your willpower is loud. Strength has to be rebuilt, not assumed. Discipline replaces bravado.
You’re entering a phase where your fire stops being decorative and starts being weaponized.
Metal advice: Rockstars don’t need to announce themselves. The ground knows when they’re coming.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Visions of Atlantis & Warkings – Pirates & King Napalm Records
VIRGO August 24 – September 22
This week messes with your idea of “home,” and not in a vinyl and beer way. More like realizing halfway through a band’s discography that your favorite album… actually kind of sucks now.
The Sagittarius New Moon throws you into that headspace where traditions, routines, and family expectations suddenly feel outdated, noisy, or poorly mixed.
You’ve been treating comfort like a production project by over tuning it, adjusting levels and fixing problems nobody else even notices.
At some point, you forgot that you’re allowed to just exist without optimizing the experience. Not every holiday season needs to be perfectly sequenced. Not every feeling needs liner notes.
Metal advice: Sometimes the raw demo hits harder than the remaster. Stop fixing the distortion, it’s the whole point.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Benighted – The Spineless Freak Season of Mist
LIBRA September 23 – October 23
This week brings one of those small disappointments that hits bigger than it should where plans fall apart and a friend flakes.
The Sagittarius New Moon makes it painfully clear which connections are starting to feel like obligation instead of enjoyment.
You’re in the middle of a doom album at home around family where you can actually chill and relax. Turns out your metal family matters way more than keeping the peace with people you’ve outgrown. This isn’t drama, it’s a rewrite.
Metal advice: You don’t owe loyalty to every band you liked once. Curate your lineup.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Lord of The Lost – Winters Dying Heart Napalm Records
SCORPIO October 24 – November 22
Money rears its ugly head this week, and yeah, it’s annoying. The Sagittarius New Moon forces you to look at your finances without distortion pedals.
What you can afford, what you can’t, and what fantasy you’ve been feeding instead of facts. Something you were hyped for may have to wait.
This isn’t punishment, it’s damage control. You’ve survived worse, but this phase requires honesty and a little restraint (I know, gross). Clean it up now so January doesn’t hit you twice as hard.
Metal advice: Budgeting isn’t selling out. It’s surviving long enough to keep making music.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Mayhem – Despair Century Media Records
SAGITTARIUS November 23 – December 21
The new moon is in your sign and somehow you’re still exhausted.
You’ve been sprinting through birthdays, holidays, concerts, noise and now you’re standing in the aftermath like, “Who left all this shit here?”
This week is about cleanup and recalibration. Less chaos, more intention. Not forever, just long enough to reset your baseline.
January brings a serious tuning around money, values, and where your energy actually goes, so start paying attention now. Freedom hits different when you’re not leaking resources everywhere.
Metal advice: Even the wildest bands rehearse. Structure doesn’t kill the vibe, it sustains it.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Epica – Avatar Nuclear Blast Records
CAPRICORN December 22 – January 20
You’re tired in a way caffeine won’t fix. The Sagittarius New Moon hits your unconscious zone, pulling the plug on your usual grind mindset.
You’re not lazy, you’re overloaded. Ignore that and your body will file a formal complaint. Meanwhile, Mars moshes into your sign, cranking your intensity way up… which makes rest feel illegal.
The move this week? Delegate. Retreat. Plot quietly. You don’t need to disappear just stop carrying all the gear alone.
Metal advice: Power isn’t constant output. Sometimes it’s knowing when to step offstage.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Unverkalt – Die Auslöschung Season of Mist
AQUARIUS January 21 – February 18
This week rewires your social circuit. The Sagittarius New Moon brings clarity around friends, collaborators, and your bandmates. Who’s actually in this with you and who’s just hanging around for the vibe.
You might feel both grateful and disappointed at the same time. That’s normal.
There’s also a low-grade burnout from world level noise you can’t control. Don’t spiral. Step back, breathe, and remember you’re allowed to opt out.
Metal advice: Not every fight is your pit. Choose where you spend your energy.
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Lik – They Metal Blade Records
PISCES February 19 – March 20
Career and public image get a soft reboot with sharp edges underneath.
The Sagittarius New Moon closes one chapter you were half ready to let go of anyway. It stings, but it also clears the fog around what actually fits you now.
You’ve been carrying way too much responsibility for way too long, and the good news is the load lightens moving into 2026.
This week favors being more low key. Talk, network and remind people you exist and that you’re still very much in the game.
Metal advice: You don’t need to disappear to evolve. Step into the light, just don’t let it blind you
Your Lucky Song of The Week: Rotten Sound – Idealist Season of Mist
Missed last weeks Metalhead Horoscope? You can find it here.
One year in, Metalhead Horoscopes is no longer an experiment, it’s a ritual. Same stars, sharper riffs, better discipline.
Whether your sign hit hard or missed slightly, the pit resets next week. Until then, trust your instincts, question the noise, and keep your standards heavy.
See you in the next cycle.
⚠️ Disclaimer: When Your Aunt Is a Cancer and Comes to Stay “Just for a Few Days”
You know she’s a Cancer because she arrives with three casseroles, a suitcase full of emotions, and unresolved family history from 1997 she absolutely plans to unpack. Loudly. Usually while you’re trying to watch a documentary about Norwegian black metal murders.
Everything hurts her feelings….everything. You didn’t hug long enough. You used the wrong tone when you said “thanks.” Suddenly she’s quiet, washing dishes aggressively.
She’s clingy in that “I just love you so much” vibe that slowly turns into emotional surveillance. Where are you going? Why are you going? Who will be there? She will absolutely cry if you leave the room too long.
Every conversation circles back to the past. Old holidays and old fights. She remembers everything, especially the stuff everyone else agreed to forget for their own mental health. And if you push back? Passive aggression. Door slamming. Emotional cold war until someone apologizes (hint: it won’t be her).
Metal takeaway: Cancers love harder than anyone but they’ll also emotionally waterboard the entire house if they don’t feel secure. Feed them. Reassure them. Hide the family photo albums. And for the love of riffs, don’t ask, “Are you okay?” unless you’ve got at least an hour free.
More from this author: Dive deeper with A Rip in Time: Women in Metal
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Metalhead Horoscope F.A.Q.
Q: Are these horoscopes real astrology or just jokes for metalheads?
A: Both. The horoscopes come from actual astrological forcasts, but the language is written in pure metalhead tongue- in-cheek because you deserve prophecy that sounds like a pit, not a PTA meeting.
Q: How do we pick the Lucky Song of the Week?
A: Each track is hand picked to echo the week’s cosmic vibe. If Mars is throwing horns, expect riffs sharp enough to cut steel. If the Moon is weeping in Virgo, you’ll get a track that slays with precision. No boring playlists, no cookie cutter picks. Just new drops, deep cuts and cult classics.
Q: Can metal really mix with astrology?
A: Of course. Both are about cycles, transformation, and intensity. Astrology tells you where the stars are screaming and metal tells you how to scream back.
Q: Why should I care about astrology if I only worship riffs and distortion?
A: Because the cosmos is basically the ultimate tour manager thats setting the stage, flipping the lights, and sometimes cancelling the gig. You don’t have to believe in it to bang your head to it.
Q: Do we take requests for Lucky Songs in our horoscopes?
A: Absolutely. Drop your ideas in the comments or shoot us a message. We might just spin your favorite band into the cosmic setlist next week.
Q: Does Metal Lair have other series like this?
A: Yes! Metal Lair runs several signature series that explore every corner of heavy music:
- Seven Deadly Songs – A weekly roundup of the most unholy new releases.
- Deep Cuts – Hidden gems and lost recordings from rock and metal history.
- A Rip in Time: Women in Metal – A series celebrating the voices, pioneers, and rule-breakers reshaping heavy music’s DNA
- World Metal Weekly – A global passport through the underground, one country at a time.
Metalhead Horoscope is a Metal Lair™ Original Series
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Sabbatha Ashvale is Metal Lair’s resident wildfire in eyeliner. A music journalist and storyteller who writes like she’s swinging a torch through the catacombs of heavy music. She’s equal parts historian and shit-stirrer. Her work focuses on artistry, history, and the often overlooked creators who define metal’s evolving future. She brings depth, grit, and a razor sharp perspective to every piece she writes.